Phenomenal . . .

Phenomenal . . .
Life, Growth, and Connection (This sunflower was nourished by my hands.) 2010; Photography by Benita Blocker. Please become a follower of this blog.

Total Pageviews

Thursday, January 16, 2014

Wrestling with the Hair Demons

 Well, to my surprise during this 2014 Sisterlocks training, the Sisterlocks(tm) instructor helped me to realize that I was still wrestling with hair demons.  What are hair demons?

The hair demons are the ones whispering in your ear telling you

  • That you need to straighten out those "beadi-bees" around your hairline.  
  • A smooth hairline is a more polished look.  
  • Your hair looks soooo nappy.  
  • You need to gel down your edges.  
  • Everyone is staring at your "nigga" naps. (Sorry for any wording offense here.)

Well, you get the picture . . .  my curl pattern is no where near the beautiful Spanish wet and wavy or the Brazilian or the Malaysian or the Indonesia curl patterns.  Many "weave" wearers do not naturally grow this type of hair, but they love to wear the exotic look of other cultures.

With most of my hair clientele being chemically straightened or mechanically straightened, I am constantly teaming up with the hair demons to keep my clientele corporate American polished with a Spanish, Brazilian, or a European flair.  This is how I make my living.

I do not come from a support group of natural hair women.  I also know that as my locks grow longer and longer, they should draw attention away from my hairline. I am waiting to really feel like "I own" my hair in its infinite beauty and uniqueness.

As stated in a previous article about resistant hair, my hair around my hairline does not want to hold straight without some heavy duty protein gel, and I refuse to get that gel all built up in my locks.

The compromise is to wear my locks styled where the edges are covered with the length of my locks.

I did not realize that I have been breed with a self-hatred because my curl pattern is not considered "pretty" by European and corporate American standards.

I can only hope that as I gain more length the beauty of the uniqueness of my tightly coiled hair will intrigue people into accepting it as beautiful because it is mine.


  1. I think your hair is beautiful and the natural hair movement hopefully will make people more accepting of our natural hair. I don't refer to any one hair on side as " beadi-bees " or "naps", I refer to them as curls. Because they are curls and they are real.

    1. Thanks Kreyola! I don't hear my hairline called beautiful too often so thanks for the love. As Nelson Mandela stated if people can learn to hate, then they can be taught to love, for love comes more naturally to the human heart . . . I am learning to love my natural hair and hoping that more people will appreciate it too!

  2. I just remembered a guy that I was dating when I had relaxed hair mentioned to me that my edges looked bad like it was time for a touch-up, and he wanted to let me know because others would be thinking the same thing. In retrospect, I have to laugh. He was letting me know as a courtesy that my curl pattern was not naturally cute. It turns out this guy was shallow in more ways than one so no love lost when our relationship ended.